Here in Toucanland, to say we are unaware of our charms would be lying. Sometimes, we even feel capable of some super-sly Jedi mind tricks, willing people with our eyes to come in and bring us more grapes. Which is why we have decided to use our powers for good (and money) by using our unique combination of cuteness and resourcefulness by taking on the wonderful world of advertising.
So, why you ask, are Toco toucans, specifically Paco, Paz, & Pepe, the ideal spokesbirds for your next advertising campaign? Well, besides the fact that they are simply awesome and beloved by all, some additional selling points include:
– Geckos, Chihuahuas, and chimps are so five years ago. Toucans are the new “it” animal of the future.
– With all they have done for the Fruit Loops franchise, the possibilities for growth potential in expanding markets are limitless
– Between their earnest, trustworthy eyes and charismatic screen presence, studies have shown that there is no demographic that does not react positively to a Toco toucan
– Paco, Paz, & Pepe are consummate professionals who strive to ensure your unique vision and expectations are not just met, but exceeded
Here are a few rough samples we have put together to give you an idea of our vast range. A full portfolio is available upon request.
Heineken Beer – Sexy beaks demand a sexy beer. Drink responsibly.
Colgate Toothbrushes – Teeth not required.
Apple iPad – Seriously – everyone has one. And you?
Saba Rock Bar – See you at Happy Hour, mis amigos.
The effectiveness of our strategic product placement is fool-proof. You no doubt have an inexplicable urge to brush your teeth, while drinking a Heineken and surfing the web on your iPad at Saba Rock Bar. Evil genius, I know.
We specialize in avian products (we do trade-out for the toys we model), environmental awareness (think: rainforest), luxury liquors, as well as niche markets such as printer cartridges and fair-trade diamonds. While we would like to remain open to all opportunities, we will note that the Three-Cans do not advertise in political arenas, teen pop star promotion, or any non-vegetarian companies (that means you dirty Beef campaign – you are NOT what’s for our dinner).
For a detailed portfolio including our pricing and model requirements (hint: papaya – lots of it), please contact the Three-Cans PR rep at firstname.lastname@example.org .